11

Honestly, I'm not sure how many of these blog posts I'll be making with just the number of the month, since eventually we'll come full circle, but here we go nonetheless.

It felt like it was a good while ago that I wrote "10" for October. But looking back, it also feels like it really wasn't that long ago. How did 31 days go by so quickly? So much has happened. Ups and downs, hills and valleys, and I also got a haircut (don't ask me how that tied into anything).

I feel like that in several of these posts that kind of kick off my posting for the month always say "ups and downs", but I feel like that while redundant, it is very much true. I mean that's life, isn't it? You get your good days, your high points, but just like everything else, it only lasts for a short while (hence why you should enjoy everything to its fullest when it happens because you'll never know when the "good times" are "good times" until they're gone). The low points naturally suck. I've hit some lows this past month, but I made it, and here I am in November of 2019, powering on. This is the last November of the 2010's, and it's odd. 2 more months, and we'll be in a whole 'nother decade.

I guess to avoid being super redundant, I'd just like to take a moment to thank God for this past month. While in one of my lows, to the point where I was thinking of dark thoughts (again), I came back to the dorm and found a lovely surprise. I went to shower and when I came out of the shower, I saw my good friend Marcus Mercer, who was my RS (resident shepherd for anyone who's not a LU student reading this) for the past 2 years. We've bonded over the past 2 years, and it was just heartwarming and comforting to see him. It helped to tend to my spirit and keep my fire going. I'm not sure why, but when I saw him, I felt this sense of "everything's going to be okay, regardless of my shortcomings and my failures, that I needn't worry about what's the come or what has been done, but that my Father in Heaven still has me".

I don't know how that feeling came about. Maybe because on my way back to the dorm from Doc's, I was praying and just begging for help. Begging to know where the next step of my life is, or at least for guidance in the direction that I should be going. Maybe because of the fact that I had no idea that Marcus was coming to visit the hall for a few days. I mean some people knew, but I didn't. It really felt like an answered prayer.

There's a special connection between Marcus and I. I remember that last semester, when I was going through a spell of depression like sadness and down feeling, that while we were worshiping God around a bonfire we had going, he just came over to my side and just put his arm around me. That time was the first time in which I had ever really gotten super emotional during worship and that I actually cried a bit. But through that worship and through the comfort of my friend, I felt my burdens of sadness and worry get lifted off of me. When I had asked him what made him walk over to me during worship, he told me that he felt God tell him to. I guess through Marcus, the Spirit of the Lord is making moves in my life.

Anyhow, to not linger on one story for too long as this preemptive post to the month of November, I just know that the Lord my God is on my side, and even when I am lazy or apathetic, that as long as I stay faithful that everything will work out for my good. He's always working for my good, no matter if I don't see Him or if I don't feel Him working.

So as we enter November, here's to staying true to my faith and to do as much damage control as possible in the areas that I still have time to fix whatever I can. Here's to the final 2 months of the 2010 decade, and here's to a life dedicated to Christ.