One Jumpy Boi

Trust me, the title is fitting because I'm almost definitely jumping to conclusions, but hear me out.

So as the post "It Went Well" would mention, I met up with a cute girl who initiated first, and we all had a good time. I sent a thank you message after all was said and done, and we eventually scheduled another hang out sort of deal that was originally for tomorrow, Wednesday, October 2nd, to go bowling at the bowling alley in the Montview Student Union at 7 pm.

Then today, as I'm just chilling in the dorm, I get a message from the girl saying that she can't make for bowling tomorrow and that she's got "so much going on rn". I'm honestly not sure how to interpret that, but to me it sounds like she just canceled on me. I mean she didn't explicitly say that, but then again she also didn't suggest to do it some other time.

I don't really know what happened. I don't if it's fair of me to be making this conclusion. But I'm upset. I know I shouldn't really let it get to me because it wasn't like it was a date or anything or anything more than a friend sort of deal to try to test the waters to see if there could be anything more than a friendship, but it just got to me. I thought I finally had the break from the usual. From the constant rejections and denials. From the 15 crushed hopes. That I could finally begin a new phase in my life. To begin searching for someone who could be a potential wife and eventually mother to children I wish to have some day. To finally be in a spot where I'm not faced with the fear of rejection.

A whole lot of conclusion jumping probably took place. Enough to almost make it an Olympic event. But seriously, this stung a bit. I'll be okay. Eventually.

After all, "why do we fall, Bruce?"